Palace is boring. Dancing is boring. I wanted to go on the Death Star...looked fun. Thought maybe I could meet some interesting people...but noooo, I have to stay here and work on some new dance for some stupid ceremony the Emperor is hosting ( Read more... )

I want to die.

I think I'm already dead, actually, and this is all some sort of... mirage after death. Dreaming beyond the grave.

They're dead. And it's my fault ( Read more... )

Mwahahaha. Alderan was a stupid planet. No one will miss it. Well, except maybe the Princess. Mwahaha.

I could get used to this.

So I went shopping at Masse's Arms Emporium today, and got a comm from one of my contacts saying that my brother owed him money or something ( Read more... )

YOU KNOW WHAT SUCKS?

(No, the correct answer is not "Me, if you're lucky.")

GOING OUT ON A SCOUTING MISSION.

AND GETTING SICK FROM IT.

I can't fly. And the sickbay is really really boring.

Who runs this stupid galaxy anyway?

Dear diary,

Today I punched somebody in the mouth for insulting Alderaan (best planet ever!!!) and he was mad.

Today he was shot down by the Rebels, never to be seen again.

It was the best day ever.

I ♥ the Empire.

So Chewie and me here are just sitting in that cantina, minding our own business and who should walk in but Dash kriffin' Rendar. Son of a Hutt's still mad over that Gargon gig. It's not my fault that I'm the better smuggler, now is it ( Read more... )

Cloud City doesn't have much of a nightlife.

Sure, you have the ugnaughts, but have you ever seen an ugnaught strip dance ( Read more... )

I can't get the blood off my fracking--

er. shoes. Yes, my foot bled while dancing and blood. Painful.

So this whole Holonet thing is filled with Rebels and they make me itch. I'm a freaking Imperial, guys. Someone get me some silk sheets and go oppress that planet over there ( Read more... )

Filtered against the Imperials.

[[Note from player: not really filtered, because that? Would be silly. We now return you to your regularly scheduled crack.]]So, we've got the plans for the Imperials' OMGsekrit superweapon, which I'm told seems to have some ridiculous amount of power going to some silly indentation shaped like a salad bowl. They're ( Read more... )